Is This Home? A Weekend at the Byzantine Catholic Seminary in Pittsburgh

“And we went into the Greek lands, and we were led into a place where they serve their God, and we did not know where we were, on heaven or on earth; and do not know how to tell about this. All we know is that God lives there with people and their service is better than in any other country."

Glory to Jesus Christ! I recently just came back from Pittsburgh after a wonderful weekend at the Byzantine Catholic Seminary of Sts. Cyril and Methodius. I have quite a story to bring back.

The seminary was very accommodating to me when I requested to visit for the weekend. One of the seminarians, Miron, picked me up at the airport and drove me through quite a hilly neighborhood; as an Illinois native, I initially felt uncomfortable at how steep some of the streets were. When we arrived, I was greeted by the rector, Fr. Robert Pipta, along with a motley crew of seminarians who I would quickly befriend.

I took every opportunity to interact with the seminarians and get to know their discernment journey. I hitched on a car ride with the Melkite seminarians (quick shout-out to Mikhael, Deacon Oliver, Chris, and especially Neven for suddenly busting out "Kordero ng Diyos" in the car) to Akron, Ohio to visit their parish assignment. There, we attended a wonderful Divine Liturgy followed by a friendly coffee hour with Fr. Eugene and the parishioners.

Back at the seminary, I got a taste of seminarian life. I got to prepare a Lenten dinner with a couple of seminarians, Chris and Kyprian, for a few other guests that came. Aside from burning a few sunflower seeds, we created the best Fumi salad ever!

I got to shadow a music workshop shortly before I left for the airport. The instructor, Coreen, was very friendly and has an excellent voice. We did a quick run-through of a few Resurrection troparia (hymns), and the seminarians practiced chanting the Epistles. Needless to say, I wished I could've stayed longer and picked up some chants to bring back to my parish in Northlake.

I was blessed to have attended the various services in the chapel, from Matins to Divine Liturgy to Vespers. The chant coming from the voices of the clergy and congregation was phenomenal and truly drove in the sense of the sacred and divine permeating the chapel.

Overall, I felt enriched and motivated by my visit to the seminary. It's been a huge step in my discernment journey, and I definitely see myself coming back in one form or another. I'm grateful to the people there for being so welcoming and willing to guide me over the weekend. To all readers, please keep me in your prayers as I continue to discern the path God wants for me.

As always, for this year's Lent, I will be posting a donation link for those giving alms. Click here to make a donation to the Byzantine Catholic Seminary and support vocations! God bless!

It's That Time of Year Again!

For many of my Roman Catholic readers, Lent is just around the corner; whether you're feasting on pączki or king cake (depending on whether you're a Northerner or Southerner, respectively), the time of fasting, prayer, and almsgiving starts on Ash Wednesday. As for us Melkite Catholics--as well as all Eastern Catholics and Eastern/Oriental Orthodox--Lent's started early or later (depending on whether you're on the Julian or Gregorian calendar).

Sweets and calendars aside, you've probably thought about what you're giving up for Lent. Some of you may have decided to keep a small simple fast, such as candy or fast food. Others may have decided to go all out monastic this year and go vegan for the next 40-50 days. Still others may have given up habits, such as smartphone usage, internet browsing, or swearing. Whatever your fast is, I wish you the best and keep you in my prayers:

"Let not the one who eats despise the one who abstains, and let not the one who abstains pass judgment on the one who eats, for God has welcomed him." --Romans 14:3

Everyone has their own individual journey to go through during Lent. In anticipation of the rebirth of our lives on the feast of Pascha/Easter, we journey together with Jesus in the wilderness, facing temptations to break our fast as well as self-reflections of our falls and shortcomings. Yes, we acknowledge that we are sinners from dust and to dust we shall return, but we are called to rise from the ashes as a new creation, stronger and better than our yesterday.

Wherever you are in life, use Lent as an opportunity for growth. Whether you're at a spiritual high or dry time, we are always called to grow and discern in our life in Christ and His Church.

As an added bonus to this post, I will keep you posted on almsgiving opportunities that you can give to for this Lenten season. Here's the first one.

St. William School Class of 2018 Graduation Fund!

As a 2009 alumni of St. William Catholic School, I'm very proud of how my faith foundation was laid out. My faith journey so far was made possible by my religious education at St. William, and I'm more than willing to support its students as they go out to the next chapters in their lives. This year's 8th grade class, the Class of 2018, is struggling to fund their graduation as well as the school's operation itself. Please take some time to give or at least share this fundraiser; it would personally mean much to me to keep my old school running. God bless y'all!

Thank You, Chester.

I was driving back home, with my phone hooked via AUX cord, and this song started playing:

I haven't delved deep enough into Linkin Park's music enough to consider myself a fan, but, in light of Chester Bennington's passing (as late as this post may be), I wanted to share how this particular song brought closure to one of the darkest chapters in my life.

Waiting for the end to come
Wishing I had strength to stand
This is not what I had planned
It's out of my control

A year prior to the release of Linkin Park's A Thousand Suns (the album in which this song is found), I was facing multiple struggles in my first semester of high school. I couldn't maintain consistency in my studies, and I was struggling to make passing grades in a couple of my classes. To make matters worse, I let myself become the victim of bullying and harassment; I was making an idiotic spectacle of myself in front of my peers, no matter how many times I tried to stand up for myself. It was only the first semester of my freshman year, and I was already being caught up in the storm of high school drama.

What was left when that fire was gone?
I thought it felt right but that right was wrong
All caught up in the eye of the storm
And trying to figure out what it's like moving on
And I don't even know what kind of things I said
My mouth kept moving and my mind went dead

The breaking point came towards the end of that semester. I had been chatting with a classmate on Facebook regarding one of the students who had been bullying me, but misunderstandings led to argument, and it escalated to the point where I, in a fit of uncontrolled rage, sent online threats to peers who I suspected of sympathizing with the bullies. At that point, I felt like the world was falling apart and collapsing on me, and that decision threw me into confusion and self-doubt. I regretted my decision and deleted the filth I had posted up, but the deed had been done.

Soon after, the incident had been reported to the school, and I was subsequently withdrawn from the student roll, a de facto expulsion. The story spread to the other schools in the area; I had to move to a new district, as my family feared backlash from students who heard about this. In addition, I had to be placed in psych rehab for about a month before I was considered fit to go back to school.

I was completely shattered by what I had done, mentally and spiritually. I quietly contemplated suicide while I languished in a sea of regret and helplessness. I didn't see any reason to keep going in life; I felt forever marked by this sin I had committed.

So I'm picking up the pieces, now where to begin
The hardest part of ending is starting again

Thank God for a wonderful family I was born into. My parents, in spite of the gravity of the situation, never gave up on me. They worked their butts off finding a new school for me and constantly kept me in their prayers, taking me to see Jesus Himself in the Adoration chapel at St. Catherine's in Glenview. Whatever friends I had left after the incident encouraged me to move on, maintaining my resolve to reform and strengthen myself.


Of all the regret and despair that had flooded my mind during my freshman year, I still had some residue of in spite of successfully finding a new environment to thrive in. "What if it happens again next year? What would I do then?" I still had more questions even after that issue had been resolved (on the surface, at least).

It was then that I stumbled onto this song while I was watching a couple of music videos on TV. The message from Waiting For The End struck deep into my heart. I wasn't alone in struggles such as what I went through. There is hope even in the deepest pitfalls of life. Life in general will be hard and trying, but you can push through, with the added bonus of a support group.

It's been almost eight years since that life event, and I still feel the effects, though in a different light. Though I had been broken down to the core, I found an opportunity to grow and learn from my mistakes. I have a more positive outlook on life; I carry my crosses, but I know it doesn't end on Calvary. Am I still struggling? Of course I am, and life will drag on with such, but at least I know I'm not alone and that I can always reach out for even the tiniest spark of hope.

For those of you who may be struggling right now, I hope this little piece of mine helps, shoddy as it is. If you or someone you know may be contemplating taking your own life, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255; that one call could turn the tide of your life.

To conclude this post: Thank you, Chester. Your music saved this life and countless others; may your work continue to impact lives around the world.

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The Fatima Experience

Today is a very special day for Catholics across the globe. Today marks the 100th anniversary of the Marian apparitions at Fatima, Portugal. In concurrence with this event, Pope Francis has canonized two of the child visionaries, Francisco and Jacinta Marto, adding them to the number of saints raised to the altars.

"On Portugal's cove on the thirteenth of May, the Virgin Maria appeared at midday."

The devotion to Our Lady of Fatima was one of the first prayers I learned as a Catholic. I read the stories on how Mary appeared to three shepherd children at the Cova da Iria in Fatima and how much those children suffered at the hands of anticlerical authorities for believing in such things. I read on the secrets revealed by Mary to the children and how they would play out for the rest of the twentieth century. I read on Sister Lucia dos Santos's life and subsequent work with the Church in the decades following the apparitions.

There was a lot of other crazy stories pertaining to the visions from various perspectives, like the disputed fulfillment of the Third Secret and the oft-debated Consecration of Russia. But, in spite of all the controversy and conspiracy theories being thrown about, now I've learned that all this is not meant to be the main focus when discussing the Fatima visions. No, it is way off to be focusing on those.

Mary's gist at Fatima, from my perspective, is clear and straightforward. The world now is in a terrible state, having endured two global conflicts, the Cold War, and terrorism; even on more local levels, families are broken, mistrust is built within communities, and personal doubts plague each and every one of us to some degree. But there is one way out, as advised by Sister Lucia: keep praying. Prayer is our lifeline to God and through which our hearts are opened to renewing grace. The consecration of a country isn't going to do much if we cannot consecrate ourselves individually; it takes penance and constant acknowledgement of who God is and our role in relation to Him.

What happened at Fatima was not simply some Delphic oracle promising nothing but Armageddon, but rather it is heaven throwing another lifeline for mankind held hostage by sin and darkness. Question is, are you going to climb that line?